Being Assertive

assertiveness

 

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”Assertiveness is your ability to act in harmony with your self-esteem without hurting others.”

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Assertiveness means standing up for your personal rights – expressing thoughts, feelings and beliefs in direct, honest and appropriate ways.

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Assertiveness enables us to act in our own best interests, to stand up for ourselves without undue anxiety, to express honest feelings comfortably and to express our personal rights without denying the rights of others.

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Responding in a passive or non assertive way tends to mean being compliant with the wishes of others which can lead to a loss of rights and self confidence.

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Many people adopt a passive response because they have a strong need to be liked by others. At such times we do not regard ourselves as equals because we put greater weight on the rights, wishes and feelings of others. Being passive can result in a failure to communicate our thoughts or feelings, resulting in us doing things we may really do not want to do in the hope that we might please others. This also means allowing others to take responsibility, to lead and make decisions for us.

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By being assertive you can help boost your self esteem and earn others’ respect. This can also help your stress, especially if you tend to take on too many responsibilities because you have a hard time saying ‘no’.

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Being assertive involves taking into consideration your own rights, wishes, wants, needs and desires, as well as those of the other person. Assertiveness means encouraging others to be open and honest about their views, wishes and feelings, so that both act appropriately.

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Assertive communication is direct and respectful. Today stand up for your interests and openly express your thoughts and feelings.

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“Staying silent is like a slow growing cancer to the soul and a trait of a true coward. There is nothing intelligent about not standing up for yourself. You may not win every battle. However, everyone will at least know what you stood for—YOU.”
Shannon L. Alder

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