In Your Own Hands

carpediem

 

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“To find yourself, think for yourself.”
Socrates

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We want to be liked and loved by the ones we care about. But the moment we lose ourselves and our identity, we can no longer be the person we want to be. When you are needy, you only damage your relationships in the long-term.

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But at the same time, we feel vulnerable to depend on our self. But it is not because when we are self reliant, we can enrich the lives of the people around us much more.

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I have only learned this in recent years. And even though I must admit I do not fully master emotional self reliance, I have made big steps that positively changed my life.

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We are too quick with expressing our emotions.

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“I’m tired.”
“People are untrustworthy.”
“My head hurts.”
“My boss is a narcissist.”

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But who really cares? Nothing is going to change when we let out all our emotions. In other words: Speaking out our emotions is not always useful.

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Instead, learn how to become a master of your feelings and emotions.

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Are you sad? Are you in love? Are you mourning? Do not hold it in. That is real.
Are you just annoyed? Being a little child? Control yourself, rather going out on a whim.

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Nothing is forever. We forget that in daily life. We get attached to objects and people. To truly appreciate something, we have to realise that we will lose it one day. If we believe that we will live forever or that we will be loved until the end of time . we get lazy. We will take things for granted.

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Try to always keep this in the back of your mind: I owe nothing, and nothing is owed to me by life……When we do that., we are not only self reliant but also appreciation of life.

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If you are unhappy or if you want to change begin to make small changes. We can not change the past. So it is better to live without regret. See things for what they are. Learn from your past and move forward.

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Being more independent will give you the freedom to do what you want without caring what others think and it will also lead you to find some original solutions to your problems. Plus, studies show that the more independent a person is the more happiness and joy they have when we can take our lives into our own hands.

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Make the most of your time today, knowing that your future is in your own hands,

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Cherish your solitude. Take trains by yourself to places you have never been. Sleep out alone under the stars. Learn how to drive a stick shift. Go so far away that you stop being afraid of not coming back. Say no when you don’t want to do something. Say yes if your instincts are strong, even if everyone around you disagrees. Decide whether you want to be liked or admired. Decide if fitting in is more important than finding out what you’re doing here.”
Eve Ensler


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